The Journey, The Ride
I am sorry friends but I did not have time for a new art project. The one pictured is a canvas I did some time ago that fit perfectly what He wanted me to share with you. Enjoy.
Journey, by definition is ‘traveling from one place to another, usually taking a rather long time.”
But Journey isn’t the destination. The journey is the journey. It is the traveling. It’s living in the light and the dark. The day and the night. It is where life hits-bare-hot-asphalt. It’s the place where we can sometimes feel like it is 5 steps forward, 3 steps back. It can feel dark and lonely and eternal.
Journey is often about gains and losses. It’s about living and learning. It is both outstanding victory and utter futility. It is about birth and death. Embracing and letting go. It’s about being both alone and surrounded. It is about trust and commitment.
“Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did”- Newt Gingrich
Philippians 3:12-14 (Passion Translation)
“I admit that I haven’t yet acquired the absolute fullness that I am pursuing, but I run with passion into HIS abundance so that I may reach the purpose that Jesus has called me to fulfill and wants me to discover. I don’t depend on my own strength to accomplish this, however I do have one compelling focus; I forget all of the past as I fasten my heart to the future ahead instead. I run STRAIGHT for the divine invitation of reaching the heavenly goal and gaining the victory prize through the anointing of Jesus.”
BUT, wouldn’t it be super cool if our journeys were like the childhood game of Candyland rather than that of Chutes and Ladders?
I don’t know about you but I would much rather ‘journey’ through Candyland. In this magical game, you start down a magical road to “sweet” surprises. One travels to delicious places like Licorice Castle, Molasses Swamp & Peanut Brittle House. Oh, to fly over Gumdrop Mountain or get lost in Candy Cane Forest. An afternoon swim in Ice Cream Sea or a latte at Cupcake Commons would be lovely too!
However, often our journeys look and feel a lot more like Chutes and Ladders. Not so much fun. You can see the goal to get to space 100 but the journey to get there is quite another matter. If you land on a good deed, you can shimmy up the ladder, but if you land on the wrong spot, down the chute you go. Up and down. Great progress followed by a sense of defeat. Hidden traps and dark corners. Creepy memories and instability and bad surprises.
My commitment to healing journey began 29 years ago. My babes were 5, 3 & 1 years old. My marriage, still new. We had been married only 5 and 1/2 years. I knew, I knew it was going to be arduous. I knew it was going to be revolting. I knew enough of my story to know that I was signing up for war. Not too far in, I also knew it was going to get much worse before it got better. Little did I know that it would cost me 29 years of my life.
Sounds like a sad and pouty story, but it was actually the journal to restoration.
I didn’t walk into this commitment lightly. I made a deal with God, yes, I gambled with Him. I said ‘ok Jesus, I will do this work however long it takes and however hard it gets, but…but you have to promise me that You will use it.’ I don’t take promises lightly and neither does He. In all His grace and love, He is fulfilling His part of the promise. Every day He uses my story. Every day, I get to live the promise. It counts, it all counts.
But seriously, how to we measure the cost? how do we define the losses or the gains? How do you measure it?
Do we count years spent? Dollars committed to this journey? Do we measure it against sleepless nights? Relationships lost? Opportunities that rushed by us while we were inside ourselves trying to stay alive and conquer the darkness of memory?
In this journey, no matter how dark or how long, we get pockets of delicious, astonishing joy. We see and feel it in the births of children and grandchildren. Marriages. Holidays shared. Friendships. Intimate conversations with a fellow survivor.
In God’s economy – time is all we have. Time to grow, time to touch, time to heal & time to learn. Time to love. These are the gains. The opportunities amidst the struggles.
Some of the deepest places of anguish in the journey have led me to beautiful time in light, bright, happy & lovely places. Jesus does that!
I firmly believe that God does not give us more than we can handle. However, I believe with equal passion that without Jesus, most things we face will feel impossible and like ‘more than we can handle’. This is not to say that it doesn’t also take an amazing amount of human grit and determination, perseverance and strength. But, He never intended for any of His children to do this alone, without Him. Without each other. I look around my life and I am insanely blown away by the people in my life. We need Him and we need each other.
My friends, take hold of the hand of the person next to you. We are all on this journey together. Everyone’s journey is different and unique to them. However, the common thing we share is that we want know that we are not alone. You are not alone. You may feel alone. I get that. I really get it. It takes risk to reach out to another and to give ourselves the gift of community and caring. It is worth the risk my friends. Worth every bit.
Blessings my friends until we meet again- In His love- Beloved Reborn